It snowed last night. Hard. While I was watching it come down in large, fluffy flakes I began to think of Rivne, Ukraine seven years ago. It snowed a lot there, too. I remembered my apartment - a little one bedroom flat with kitchen appliances that seemed to be a hundred years old! The walls were adorned with large area rugs. And our landlord's stuff was packed in all of the closets leaving us the main living area to store our suitcases that were full of materials to last us for two years.
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| Main Room |
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| Kitchen |
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| Bedroom |
As I reflected on these memories last night, I snuggled up next to my wife watching the large snowflakes float effortlessly to the ground. I felt the warmth of the heater in my room. I thought about the computers, TV, iPad, nice appliances, and other first world comforts that surrounded me at the moment. I recognized that I am back in this comfortable middle-class life and am definitely not in need. What a perfect realization for this time of year.
From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>
Date: December 28, 2005 1:01:13 AM AKST
Subject: Priveet from Rivne
"Hi all!
This is one gigantic letter which I am sending to all because time unfortunately is limited and yeah...
THANKS
FOR THE EMAILS!!! yay, I have now had conversation with everyone...oh
boy, there were a lot, with a lot of questions so I hope I cover em
all...if not oh well, you all will still love me and be there upon my
return ;)
Quick request though. I found out that my myldsmail.com account doesn't have a lot of memory so please send letters to gstoddard86@yahoo.com - it has a ton more!
About letters and packages and stuff, haven't gotten any, but we got a shipment of mail today so i'll keep my fingers crossed.
Alright, a little about Rivne...
Rivne is pretty big, dunno how many people, but it's pretty big...much bigger than coalville anyway. It's winter here, there's ice covering the ground 100% so it's tough to walk around...I've only fallen once and it wasn't that bad.
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| A fall mark. |
The
members here are amazing...I love em, and as time rolls along I'm
finding more and more time to chit chat with em and I'm understanding
and communicating a lot better...just cuz you can't understand words
people say doesn't mean you can't read body language, or put things in
to context with what you do know. and I get other
missionaries who can interperet as well...but I'm trying really hard to
just have conversations by myself...and it's a lot of fun.
So I have a new goal...a lot of pondering over it today. Mornings are really hard for me cuz there's a lot of quiet down time in which I can think a lot...lately about family and homesickness...but when I get outside, it kinda goes away. So I'm open for suggestions as to how I can manage that an overcome slightly. A tip i got from some of the other missionaries, and good old General Authorities is to lock up your heart. I had an epiphany today when I began work on Heidi's tape...everyone else'll get one in due time, I just know where my priorities lie ;) j/k...but I was really sad thinking those dreadful thoughts about dear johns and whatnot...well I then decided that that was a stupid thought, that heidi's been my friend since 5th grade...she has a bunch of schooling still ahead of her...2 years isn't that much time for her to totally emigrate to khatmandu or whatever...the same principle applies to my family (with the exception of Cory and Chad going to Eastern USA lol). You guys are there...you still love me...you're still going to love me throughout the 2 years...I can't do anything about what you guys do there here, so what the hey...I'll be ok! :)
So that was my battle with homesickness today and i overcame...good eh...anyway, back to my goal...I'm gonna try to go without missing or whatever each day but rather thinking of good things and all that crap. Sounds fun right.
So on to the most FAQ's...
Christmas - it was good...while we were supposed to go out and work, it was an odd day...both Elder Hassell and I have 2 sets of parents so we got double the phone calls...hooray for divorce :)...then, it was Sunday so we still had church and all...not a whole lot of time other than that...it was pretty relaxing and good to talk with family...best present ever.
K, quick new story, we have this recent convert named Okcana...she's the coolest...she's always positive and upbeat...yada yada. Well she was sick yesterday and called us over to give her a blessing. So I did the anointing and Elder hassell did the blessing and as it all went down I was amazed and totally overcome with the greatest feeling...If I weren't there, she wouldn't be getting the blessing, without missionaries sucking up the harsh weather and dreariness she never would have found the gospel and found the true happiness she feels now...she tells us all the time that we are her happiness and we've given her reasons to live (her daughter died a little while ago I found out...very sad) it made me realize how truly blessed I am. I look at my life, compare it to others and I have it really good. I have a wonderful family, who's world has stopped turning because I'm gone...no humility yet ;)...I have awesome friends who are taking good care of each other, who love me very much and I know I need not worry about. I have the gospel in my life, eternal happiness in other words, and I know I'm doing what's right...plus look at it this way...I don't have to deal with all the chaos of regular everyday life...Woman, you know what I'm talking about right. Life is great, and as i write this email i realize it more and more. That doesn't change the fact that I miss you all to tears...literally...but I can be happy, and I can find peace in those tough morning times and times where there's no sunshine and the styrofoam is falling off the buildings around here. I have the gospel, a wonderful life, let's forget about me and bring these people to it eh?
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| Me and Oksana |
Anyway...that
was a little rant...I finished the book of mormon again...yes HJ I am
an overachiever, but I totally am glad I did...it's awesome...those of
you who read this who haven't read it recently...do it, you'll be glad
you did...plus as I'm starting over again, you can think about how I'm
in the same spots as you reading the same thing and we can all have
happiness and joy for the next 21 months! HOORAY
Pictures pictures pictures...I'm gonna work on getting a bunch working today...we'll have to see, but I'm taking more and more, and trying to get myself in them.
Family, I'm very very proud of all of you. You all are such hard working, loving, supportive, beautiful people. Your miracles to me and I'm grateful for you. You help me to realize that I play the pity party game on myself to much...when you all have it a lot harder than I do. Heidi Jane, thanks for your strength...I love your emails explaining how hard you are working for the gospel...remember those words you wrote me "i never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it"
Woman
- thanks for your long emails...I smile and realize that you enjoy
talking...and you know what I do to...sorry I don't nail every one of
your questions all the time.
Dad - I didn't get your email send it again...I wanna read your lyrics...gstoddard86@yahoo.com please
Heidi & Mike - thanks for coming into my life...you're the best parents I could ever ask for.
Grandmas
and Grandpas, wherever you are, whenever you receive this - I
especially love you and thank you for your love and care over these 19
years.
Well
everyone... I think that's about all I can muster for today...it felt
good to get that all of my chest and let you know how much I love and
appreciate you...I would go back through all my emails, but I deleted em
all cuz I didn't have anymore room...and I need room in the myldsmail.net one because that's were I get important news from the mission office.
anyway... love ya tons.
Hi meg - :)...thought you'd like something too - READ THE BOOK OF MORMON :D
I'm gonna work hard this week...pray for me please ;)
few quick scriptures - Ephesians 3:7-8 how I feel about my calling
Ephesians 6 :18-19 a thought about prayers and stuff.
Woman, please send this out to everyone cuz I don't have a bunch of addresses (i.e. grandparents and anyone else)
love love love!
--Grant
Elder Stoddard"
I love this flash down memory lane. I especially like looking at it now, seven years later, and thinking about how life changes our directions and perspectives. As I read about Okcana, I thought about how much more you could relate to her now after Luke's death than you could then as a fresh 19-year-old kid from small-town Utah. Your realization about the comforts of home now vs. then are even greater since you provide not only for yourself, but a small family of four. The hindsight about Dear Johns is also interesting and reminds me again of the Parable of Caroline Spine. I'm so glad that you have all of these emails, and even more grateful that you are a writer who sent home terrific emails. Love you!
ReplyDeleteMan, reading this stuff brings back so many memories. I was going through basically the exact same stuff at the exact same time.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I would have made it without you, buddy. The Good Lord saw fit that not only did we serve near each other, but that our companions were some bizarre version of district leaders and had to go on exchanges with each other from time to time, which meant that we got to go on exchanges from time to time. I'm glad we were able to be there for each other.
Amen to that, Seve.
ReplyDeleteFor some reason I can't see any of the pictures in your posts except for the post you did today (11/25)
ReplyDelete