An Overwhelming Start

Arriving in Ukraine was the scariest thing I had ever done in my life up to that point.  I think that these first e-mails really do a good job catching the stress I was feeling, though I did hide a lot so that people wouldn't worry about me.

From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>

Date: December 21, 2005 12:51:32 AM AKST

Subject: First e-mail overseas

"Hi,

Wow...things are CRAZY.  My head has not stopped spinning since I arrived here!  I have no clue what to think, it's just completely out of control.  So things are good though, my new companion's name is Elder Hassell and he's pretty cool.  The most amazing thing is he loves Caroline's Spine just as much as i do...go figure, I travel 5000 miles around the world to find someone who has heard of them.  cool eh?  Missionary work is a lot different than what I thought to be quite honest with you...I assumed tracting tracting tracting, but that couldn't be further from the truth...it's really a lot of planning lessons and meetings with people, and working in some tracting and what not.  So it's been an adaptation on so many levels.  Our appartment is kinda weird...small lots of crazy imperfections and the land lady has more stuff there than we do.  So it's all good :)  

I'm still getting used to it all, but things have gradually improved each day...it's been a pretty tough week.  the whole thought that I'm 5000 miles away from everyone is tough, I've been pretty homesick, but right as I find a reason to break down and cry, I start reading scriptures or something and pray, and things just pick up from there...

one thing is for sure, I'm definately figuring out that I'm very priviledged to have the family that I do.  I thought about it today...I can buy tons of stuff here for dirt cheap, so christmas is probably gonna be pretty good, but I'd trade it all to be home w/ you.  That's probably not the most uplifting comment, but it's what is on my mind right now.  I've entered the mission field at a very difficult time concerning loneliness and homesickness, but oh well все гаразд wow that's hard to type.

So yeah...I love you all tons, I'm stoked to be able to write emails.

Along the lines of Christmas calls...hooray!

[Here I wrote a lot about what time family should call and how to get a hold of me.]

Well, that's all the big important news  I needed to get out of the way.  Simple eh?  I hope.  Merry Christmas and Happy freakin' new year ;)

Trying to get adjusted and used to life has been a little stressful if you can't tell...at least I feel comfortable now to buy things...well for the most part

I'm getting to where I can pick out tidbits of what people are talking about, can't understand like anything and it's tough cuz I start to fall asleep in discussions...trying to catch back up and all, and when I try to make contacts by myself i get times when I have no clue what's going on...so I just say...the church is true and the book of mormon also...:)  It makes my task of being a bold missionary pretty easy ;)  cuz that's all I can say.

everything will work out...I know it, I have faith.  It's just a life adjustment.  The lord is taking care of me every step of the way, so I don't know why i worry at all.

well this is the big general one, I'll try to get pictures worked out, and maybe some simple hi's to everyone if time permits...we'll see.

Love you all so much!

--Grant

Elder Stoddard"

This is an e-mail that I sent to my mom.

From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>

Date: December 21, 2005 1:41:35 AM AKST

Subject: quick hi

"hey...I have a bit more time.

just wanna give a shout out to everyone...please know my general message was just chaotic...it feels good to get it over to be honest with ya.  I just hope all will work out w/ the christmas calls and all...I know it will, the Lord's helping :)

Hi meg, hi Mike, Hi Woman.

Tell Heidi Hi for me...I'm definately gonna work on getting pics to you...I've got em taken, now just gotta get them there.

tell Brayden Hi...Tell everyone Hi.  I love you all very much I hope you know that.

Woman, Reevna - that's how you pronounce Рівне (Rivne) just FYI

Yes I was very overwhelmed...and I quite frankly felt very small, insignificant and alone.  My home is long gone...but only for 2 years...and everyone does a good job of trying to help me out with worries and fears.

Merry Christmas...it feels normal here nothin really new and exciting...hmmm, just realized something...I read about Christ's birth today in the book of mormon...go figure 

I'm very grateful for his work.  which is now my work, and will be forever as a member of his church.  it's a bit scary to walk up to people and start talking, cuz I don't want them to talk back...I can say all I need to, but if they talk back...I'm SOL

anyway.  say hi to heidi for me...give her a big hug.

give each other big hugs.

KKLLHH [Kiss kiss, love love, hug hug.]

--Grant

Elder Stoddard""