The Gospel Anchor

Not a whole lot of time for commentary this morning.  I will say this: I was touched by my testimony at the end of the letter.  My friend Heidi had lost her mom to leukemia while I was in the MTC and that's what I was referring to when I said,

"We've all learned hard lessons about parting from people we hold dear in the last little while. Always remember that. Remember that the love of the gospel and its principles can help with ANYTHING."

Well, now I've lost a son and have needed to hold onto that faith even stronger.  I know that what I said then is true.  The gospel is everything in my life.  It serves as an anchor, not as a restricting tether, in this crazy world.  I'm grateful for the opportunity I had to learn those things while serving a mission.

"From: Grant Stoddard <gstoddard86@yahoo.com>

Date: January 11, 2006 1:04:16 AM AKST

Subject: I've been in Ukraine for 28 days?!?!

Who's ready for a sermon...hee hee 

Wow family... 

I say that cuz you're all family...we are all such freakin' amazing children of a loving heavenly father! HOORAY. 

So first off...wow...Nicole's in Arizona, and Brayden's in the mtc...someone get me his mtc box and info so I can dear elder him...joels too if poss...also nicole's email as soon as you find out. 

next...how am I? I'm doing great. 

things just pick up and pick up and pick up...the language is still a very difficult barrier, but one I know that I'm capable of overcoming. all is well, all is well.

the work has still been kind of slow...but it's picking up. holidays are getting over...hallelujiah...and we're finding more and more people...I guess just in time for me to drop a companion and start figuring stuff out for myself here...that is if I get to stay (transfers are top-secret/confidential cool huh?) I do know that Elder Hassell is headin' out, so that's a certainty. 

Let's take a look back at the week...one of the cool things is we have these planners and I just look back and can give a quick description of stuff...no worries, I'm keepin a hold on the planners so we can all gather round and look at them upon my return.

We teach English twice a week...not sure if I mentioned that, tuesdays and thursdays...and those mornings we take care of handing out a bunch of english flyers and this past week we had a lot of fun doing it...I'm feeling more and more comfortable all the time to just get in someone's face and saying "hey do you know english?" it's not that bad at all...then as they talk to me...I understand what I can...and smile when I can't, it's great. seriously though...I'm on a positive note w/ the lang (still don't know it, but i'm learning how to accept that a little better). 

so we had some members come do that with us...okcana and ira...they're like gung ho on missionary work and helped us out a ton...we handed out quite a few books of mormon and flyers and invitations...the best ones being the the santa clauses that are out on the street for pictures...they accepted...and one of the big mice guys wants to start having meetings w/ elders bowen and mcarthur. Cool eh?

No idea who the mouse guy is.

Had a really good wrap up to the Plan of Salvation lesson w/ this girl named marina...unfortunately we have to stop meeting w/ her since she's going to Kyiv, but we hit her hard w/ commitments and testimonies...throughout the lesson we really weren't feeling the spirit at all, I guess she'd just ripped in to the member we were gonna have teach with us and she went home all sad...so we were kinda down on the fact that Marina isn't very nice...well I sit there in the lesson...I'd gone over my part w/ death and the spirit world and was kinda just...blah, and then I looked at the picture of Jesus hanging on the wall...let me bear testimony of the importance of artwork of sacred things - they're amazing...anyway...I looked at him and got hit hard...This is the plan of FREAKIN' salvation! this girl needs this more than anything in her life! she needs this knowledge and to know what to do in order to live again with our loving Heavenly Father and Elder Brother Jesus Christ and eternal families and all of that. What's more important, she needs to understand the truthfulness of it, and the amazing blessing it is to have this through the modern revelations of Prophets in our timE! and how does she do that? BY READING THE BOOK OF MORMON...da da da!! So she hadn't really been much of a lesson, and we finished the principles...kingdoms of glory, and I said..."look at that picture of Jesus"...he loves you...do you love him...she said yes and I said he wants you to return to him and do what's right...I said she needs to do what is right and that this plan we've just taught is the outline of what we've got to do...I testified of its truthfulness and how she had to know if it were true or not...the very nature of her soul depended on it. I spoke boldly and, "with meekness and mildness (that's a scriptural thing that I loved when I found, cuz I needed a little more of it)" and simply hit up how important it was for her. And it was amazing...the spirit was so strong and Elder Hassell told me afterward, it was one of the best testimonies he's ever heard on it, and as he watched her...he could tell she was influenced...well he committed her hard core to pray even if she has to catch pnemonia out in the cold doing it to find out if it's all true, and if it is...she'll be baptized...little surprise for her...it is true, so theorhetically...she's gonna be baptized :)...I have faith ;)

Teaching Marina 

anyway...so that was really good. then we've had a lot of lessons with members (recent converts/less actives) and they've been really good...A lot of them have started asking really deep doctrinal questions...stuff I myself am not completely knowlegeable on, in english let alone Ukrainian and it's been awesome how the Lord has helped me to resolve some concerns by going to the basics of all things. That's one of the greatest things I've learned thus far...go to the basics...is the Book of Mormon True? Was Joseph a prophet? Did our Father in Heaven and His son Jesus Christ appear to him? it's so amazing to look at that and answer yes and then know what you have to do (i.e. some amazing girl overcoming the adversity of a family in order to be baptized) 

Had a lockdown on Sat. for their Christmas...we went and planned an activity we'll be having and got that all squared away. then slept over at Bowen's and McArthur's.

good Sunday...had an hour of church...I bore my testimony :)...it's amazing I can do that and tell all the members there that I Love Them and thank them for helping me feel at home...yay for them and learning! Made an awesome dinner...oh ps I'm a ketchup fan now...of fried potatoes...farsch (hamburger) w/ basically ketchup and some spaghetti sauce mixed making a really good sauce and noodles...I tell ya what...it was better than most things I've had back home...how I've grown eh? 

Then elder Hassell and I got a little closer as we had a really good talk...he's leaving Rivne in about 10 days can you believe it?! We can't. Stayed the night at Bowen and McArthur's again so as to send in numbers for the week (Hassell's Zone Leader work) 

Went on exchanges with elder Adair (mom, he's the one in the picture's of the pancakes)...had some good lessons and finding experiences...found them some people and helped give a baptisimal commitment to this guy who's really interested. 

So I didn't sleep in my bed for 3 nights in a row...kinda a bummer...but yesterday I hooked up w/ Elder Hassell again...had Vika skip out on our lesson where we were gonna get her baptisimal date and stuff worked out, and worked a bit w/ Okcana about some of her deep questions about polygamy and eternal marriage and how she's kinda confused about it all...her big question was why the Lord chose at this time to recall polygamy (as w/ Abraham and Jacob and Isaac...but w/ Solomon and David it was bad...all those tough questions I didn't think would be present in Ukraine of all places?!) and I just thought about this thing about the Christlike attribute of Humility and Patience I'd read in Preach My Gospel that I really liked...and go figure we were in the Church's Library and they have Ukrainian Preach My Gospels. So I grabbed it and we talked about obedience and how I have no clue why it was a commandment of God...it's hard for me to accept...but I have a testimony of how Joseph was an obedient servant and brought it into the church because the Lord asked...and we should follow his example and be obedient and follow the Lord even when he tries our faith as in this time...she really understood that and kept thanking me last night for how I taught that...she says I have the answer she always needs...last time was faith is not to have a perfect knowlege...lol. Poor Okcana, I wish I could have the other answers for her. all is well though...she's easily our strongest member. 

then I taught English w/ Elder Bowen and got to sleep in my bed. YAY 

that was my week. 

fun fun eh? 

Family...something I thought was funny...it mentions wickedness and geneology in this one - Titus 3:9...I couldn't help think of all our people who are obsessed w/ dead people...haha kidding. 

Hope all is well with everyone individually. 

I love you...hope you know this. 

Love one another...can you believe I've been gone as long as I have? Wow...goes fast when you look back...but not ahead....that's been my key to sanity. Look back from time to time, and focus on the present (it's a gift remember) 

I just would like to tell you all how greatful I am for the man Joseph Smith. Boy one things for sure...I know that he saw God and Jesus Christ. I couldn't manage here if I didn't know 100 percent that that were true...and that through this knowledge...we have proof that our Heavenly Father loves us, and wants what's best for us...Jesus lived, died and resurrected, showing us what we need to do in this life...how we ought to live and how we ought to be toward one another. 

Love each other. We've all learned hard lessons about parting from people we hold dear in the last little while. Always remember that. Remember that the love of the gospel and its principles can help with ANYTHING. when in doubt pray. the power of it is real. I promise. If you have any doubts about anything I've said...here's my answer for ya - READ THE FREAKIN' BOOK OF MORMON...it's proof of EverythinG! and I mean it. 

Thank you for your examples. you are all great. Sorry no pictures...the comp is dumb today, and i wrote a lot longer than expected. 

KKLLHH! (kiss kiss love love hug hug...for those who don't now)

--Grant

Elder Stoddard"

The MTC and the Big Party Afterwards

Thanks for all the comments on the last post.  They gave me a lot of ideas about how to improve these posts.  Good 'ol Mom sent me a Dropbox folder full of pictures that I sent home (good thing because my other ones are probably all packed right now) and suggested that I add pictures to the posts.  I thought that was a great idea, so you'll get a lot today.

My friend Seve Isaacs also made a comment and I began thinking that this blog will miss an important part of my mission: my experience in the Missionary Training Center (MTC).  With that said, I thought I'd write a quick overview of my experience there.

I was at the Provo MTC from September 28, 2005 to December 14, 2005. Initially there were six other Ukrainian-speaking elders with me. Elders McGary and Jackson were a companionship; Elders Isaac, Johnson, and Higbee were a three-some; and then there was me and my companion, Elder Pace. We had three amazing teachers to begin with - Брат (pronounced brat as in bratwurst and means brother) Carrier, Сестра (pronounced Sestra, means sister) Naumova, and Брат Barabash, who was from L'viv Ukraine. Sister Naumova and Brother Barabash left us while we were in the MTC, Brother DeGroot came in toward the end.  Their job was to teach us the gospel, how to teach, and how to speak Ukrainian.

My companion, Elder Pace

The crew minus Elder McGary.  He ended up leaving earlier than all the rest of us because he'd been in the MTC learning Russian before we all got there.

For twelve long weeks we worked to learn how to teach people that Jesus Christ suffered for the sins of mankind and that the Church of Jesus Christ had been restored to the earth by a prophet named Joseph Smith (for more information about all of this, visit this website).  We also received instruction from modern-day prophets and apostles, sang in choirs, exercised, ate delicious food, served in the temple, did laundry, wrote letters home, attended church meetings, talked with people over the phone about the church, got haircuts, and had a lot of fun doing it all.  The MTC is like a little community and has just about everything a person could ever want or need.

And then we were shipped to the country.  Some of us (I speak only of myself really) felt inappropriately confident in our language abilities and preparedness.  Don't worry, we would all soon learn just how difficult life as a missionary could be and just how good we had had it back at the MTC, a sheltered environment to say the least.

The e-mail below is another juicy one.  So much could happen in one week.  Oh wait, that hasn't changed.  So much is still happening in each hectic week.

"From: Grant Stoddard <gstoddard86@yahoo.com>
Date: January 4, 2006 4:58:51 AM AKST
Subject: There was sunshine...blessed sunshine ;)

Hi all.I figure, everyone gets to read this so I'll say all.  First off thank you so very much for all of the emails.  I love them all...don't ever hesitate to write, or i might go crazy.  I have to tell you the coolest thing.  We had sunshine for the first time the other day...it was wonderful and glorious...halle-freakin'-lujah!  :) 

No seriously though, I was beginning to think it wasn't a real thing, so it's good to know the sun works here too. 

All the snow melted and then it's back today...the past few days had been really nice, now it's cold once again...bummer, oh well all is well. 

Couple of quick random things - Scriptures:D& C 29:39 - No bitter, no sweet.  Oh man, let me tell you this scripture just got me.  It was discovered and instantly one of my favorites cuz i desperately needed it.Next - this one's to make you know I'm still a normal Grant Stoddard guy - 1 Tim. 2:11-14...I still laughed :)D & C 38:7 - This one I found after I prayed and prayed accusing the Lord of not being there with me...whoops, I guess I got told.k...that's outta the way. 

Things are doing a ton better!  It's kinda weird though, I still have tough days, it's just getting less and less frequent.  This week i can say I didn't think about home as much...i kept my focus on what I needed to be doing and learning, and the time just cruised buy...i've been in this country for 21 days now, can you believe it? 

not a ton as far as progress in our work is concerned...Elder Hassell has an interesting role as both a trainer and a zone leader so he has a whole other companion that we have to go visit (i.e. yesterday we went to lutsk) and so it's not like i have the full trainer attention directed toward me so I'm learning a bit about who I am and what I'm doing.  I had a big heart to heart talk with myself in front of the mirror the other day, very helpful, in which I told myself that I loved me, and we were gonna get through this and that for the first time in my life I'm kind of learning who I really am...we're gonna define Wesley Grant Stoddard...shall we...here's what I know - I work hard, I have wonderful family and friends, I love the Lord and his son Jesus Christ, I'm not perfect nor do I strive to be...no one at home expects it (hopefully) but more importantly my Heavenly Father and dear Older Brother don't either...hence the reason we have the whole Christmas season (He came to this world for imperfect people like me)...but no worries...I'm still workin' on it, and should be by the time I get home ;) 

We have this cool lady named Vika right now who is looking at baptism right now...our awesome recent convert okcana is pushing her and helping a ton...feel free to pray for her if you'd like 

Me and my anal nature are working on organizing our area book and ways of doing things right now...I figure as organized as I can do this, the more efficient and effective I'll be able to work.  I have a feeling, the organization's really gonna pick things up especially as these holidays get over (remember in Ukraine they have holidays and stuff up until the 14th).  

New Years Eve - went over to Elder Bowen (our District Leader) and Elder MacArther's apartments and watched a bunch of slide shows of elder macarther's girlfriend...we didn't have nothing else to watch except a thing in russian on joseph smith (don't worry we watched that too) and that was it...we also made donuts and drank this fake champagne stuff like sparkling apple cider...mmm mmm...although, funny story, remember how everyone drinks here, well this stuff is for babies and so as we walk out of the store, all the people laugh :) oh well 

Our district enjoying the greatest drink on the earth: Zhivchik

Elder Bowen and our homemade donuts 

we were in at 6 pm both new years eve and new years day...all the crazy drunk weirdos and all...and this saturday it looks like we're doing the same (their Chrismas...heidi's Baptism hooray) but on new years I read quite a bit, and wrote in my journal...not a whole lot.  Then monday we had this really big ward party starting at 5 and going until 9 so we were in there...but it was a lot of fun...our members are all so cool and loving etc...

which brings us to yesterday...yesterday was amazing...I went to lutsk with elder hassell and met up with elder woodruff and elder isaacs (he was from the mtc) and we went on exchanges...I was with elder isaacs - it was awesome...we don't understand anything, but we were able to go and work our butts off...getting in at night and just crashing cuz we were tired.  We taught and taught and taught...and talked to each other about our problems and kinda worked on how we could overcome them...we're all normal and struggling as newbies...thanks for pointing that out those that did. 

A castle in Lutsk.  Unfortunately, this was the only picture I really took while there with Elder Isaacs.

so yesterday was good. 

oh another quick note...we had our Branch President come and live with us for 5 days...I may have mentioned this, not sure, but it was great...he's such an amazing man, we'd come home and he'd have dinner made for us and we'd just talk about life and the gospel and how great it all was.  he was a lot of fun (and he let us borrow the projector and dvd player so we could watch elder macarther's slide shows)... 

President Didushok, Elder Hassell, and I enjoying a lovely dinner of pasta, sardines, some strange chicken patties, mayonnaise, and that baby champagne I referred to above (President Didushok made it.  That was some good 'ol authentic Ukrainian cooking.)  

here's a quick request and note...I haven't gotten any packages but it's all good...more stuff halfway through my mission eh ;) j/k, I dunno they'll get here sometime...but in the meantime if anyone ever gets the crazy idea to send one...I would love peanut butter and jerky... 

[Babble about e-mailing pictures.]

family and friends...I love you all.  you're truly wonderful...know you're always on the back of my mind and everything even if I get so caught up in the work that I forget to think about you sometimes haha j/k...but here was some advice given from the mtc that I've been thinking about.  Put both feet into the mission, and take both feet out when you get back home.  That's what I plan to do, and know that as I do...it'll be good...My best friend Brayden needed some attention in this letter...so hi...you're going in to the MTC SOON!  YAY!  And my other best friend (HJ) mentioned something that was great - in an eternal perspective 2 years is nothing.  truly...all is well. 

I love you all,love one another! give big hugs and kisses and let little things go please...there's so much good in all things to let the dumb things direct you.talk to you next week!  Kiss kiss, love love, hug hug 

--Grant"

Reflections on Rivne

It snowed last night. Hard. While I was watching it come down in large, fluffy flakes I began to think of Rivne, Ukraine seven years ago. It snowed a lot there, too. I remembered my apartment - a little one bedroom flat with kitchen appliances that seemed to be a hundred years old! The walls were adorned with large area rugs. And our landlord's stuff was packed in all of the closets leaving us the main living area to store our suitcases that were full of materials to last us for two years.

Main Room

Kitchen

Bedroom

It was a dark time for me, a culture shock to say the least.  I came from a comfortable middle-class lifestyle.  I stepped into a second-world country, complete with its Soviet apartments that hadn't been updated since the sixties.  It was cold.  It was dark.  It was discouraging.

As I reflected on these memories last night, I snuggled up next to my wife watching the large snowflakes float effortlessly to the ground.  I felt the warmth of the heater in my room.  I thought about the computers, TV, iPad, nice appliances, and other first world comforts that surrounded me at the moment.  I recognized that I am back in this comfortable middle-class life and am definitely not in need.  What a perfect realization for this time of year.

From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>

Date: December 28, 2005 1:01:13 AM AKST

Subject: Priveet from Rivne

"Hi all!

This is one gigantic letter which I am sending to all because time unfortunately is limited and yeah...

THANKS FOR THE EMAILS!!! yay, I have now had conversation with everyone...oh boy, there were a lot, with a lot of questions so I hope I cover em all...if not oh well, you all will still love me and be there upon my return ;)

Quick request though.  I found out that my myldsmail.com account doesn't have a lot of memory so please send letters to gstoddard86@yahoo.com - it has a ton more!

About letters and packages and stuff, haven't gotten any, but we got a shipment of mail today so i'll keep my fingers crossed.

Alright, a little about Rivne...

Rivne is pretty big, dunno how many people, but it's pretty big...much bigger than coalville anyway.  It's winter here, there's ice covering the ground 100% so it's tough to walk around...I've only fallen once and it wasn't that bad.

A fall mark.

The members here are amazing...I love em, and as time rolls along I'm finding more and more time to chit chat with em and I'm understanding and communicating a lot better...just cuz you can't understand words people say doesn't mean you can't read body language, or put things in to context with what you do know.  and I get other missionaries who can interperet as well...but I'm trying really hard to just have conversations by myself...and it's a lot of fun.

So I have a new goal...a lot of pondering over it today.  Mornings are really hard for me cuz there's a lot of quiet down time in which I can think a lot...lately about family and homesickness...but when I get outside, it kinda goes away.  So I'm open for suggestions as to how I can manage that an overcome slightly.  A tip i got from some of the other missionaries, and good old General Authorities is to lock up your heart.  I had an epiphany today when I began work on Heidi's tape...everyone else'll get one in due time, I just know where my priorities lie ;) j/k...but I was really sad thinking those dreadful thoughts about dear johns and whatnot...well I then decided that that was a stupid thought, that heidi's been my friend since 5th grade...she has a bunch of schooling still ahead of her...2 years isn't that much time for her to totally emigrate to khatmandu or whatever...the same principle applies to my family (with the exception of Cory and Chad going to Eastern USA lol).  You guys are there...you still love me...you're still going to love me throughout the 2 years...I can't do anything about what you guys do there here, so what the hey...I'll be ok! :)

So that was my battle with homesickness today and i overcame...good eh...anyway, back to my goal...I'm gonna try to go without missing or whatever each day but rather thinking of good things and all that crap.  Sounds fun right.

So on to the most FAQ's...

Christmas - it was good...while we were supposed to go out and work, it was an odd day...both Elder Hassell and I have 2 sets of parents so we got double the phone calls...hooray for divorce :)...then, it was Sunday so we still had church and all...not a whole lot of time other than that...it was pretty relaxing and good to talk with family...best present ever.

K, quick new story, we have this recent convert named Okcana...she's the coolest...she's always positive and upbeat...yada yada.  Well she was sick yesterday and called us over to give her a blessing.  So I did the anointing and Elder hassell did the blessing and as it all went down I was amazed and totally overcome with the greatest feeling...If I weren't there, she wouldn't be getting the blessing, without missionaries sucking up the harsh weather and dreariness she never would have found the gospel and found the true happiness she feels now...she tells us all the time that we are her happiness and we've given her reasons to live (her daughter died a little while ago I found out...very sad) it made me realize how truly blessed I am.  I look at my life, compare it to others and I have it really good.  I have a wonderful family, who's world has stopped turning because I'm gone...no humility yet ;)...I have awesome friends who are taking good care of each other, who love me very much and I know I need not worry about.  I have the gospel in my life, eternal happiness in other words, and I know I'm doing what's right...plus look at it this way...I don't have to deal with all the chaos of regular everyday life...Woman, you know what I'm talking about right.  Life is great, and as i write this email i realize it more and more.  That doesn't change the fact that I miss you all to tears...literally...but I can be happy, and I can find peace in those tough morning times and times where there's no sunshine and the styrofoam is falling off the buildings around here.  I have the gospel, a wonderful life, let's forget about me and bring these people to it eh?

Me and Oksana

Anyway...that was a little rant...I finished the book of mormon again...yes HJ I am an overachiever, but I totally am glad I did...it's awesome...those of you who read this who haven't read it recently...do it, you'll be glad you did...plus as I'm starting over again, you can think about how I'm in the same spots as you reading the same thing and we can all have happiness and joy for the next 21 months!  HOORAY

Pictures pictures pictures...I'm gonna work on getting a bunch working today...we'll have to see, but I'm taking more and more, and trying to get myself in them.

Family, I'm very very proud of all of you.  You all are such hard working, loving, supportive, beautiful people.  Your miracles to me and I'm grateful for you.  You help me to realize that I play the pity party game on myself to much...when you all have it a lot harder than I do.  Heidi Jane, thanks for your strength...I love your emails explaining how hard you are working for the gospel...remember those words you wrote me "i never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it"

Woman - thanks for your long emails...I smile and realize that you enjoy talking...and you know what I do to...sorry I don't nail every one of your questions all the time.

Dad - I didn't get your email send it again...I wanna read your lyrics...gstoddard86@yahoo.com please

Heidi & Mike - thanks for coming into my life...you're the best parents I could ever ask for.

Grandmas and Grandpas, wherever you are, whenever you receive this - I especially love you and thank you for your love and care over these 19 years.

Well everyone... I think that's about all I can muster for today...it felt good to get that all of my chest and let you know how much I love and appreciate you...I would go back through all my emails, but I deleted em all cuz I didn't have anymore room...and I need room in the myldsmail.net one because that's were I get important news from the mission office.

anyway... love ya tons.

Hi meg - :)...thought you'd like something too - READ THE BOOK OF MORMON :D

I'm gonna work hard this week...pray for me please ;)

few quick scriptures - Ephesians 3:7-8 how I feel about my calling

Ephesians 6 :18-19 a thought about prayers and stuff.

Woman, please send this out to everyone cuz I don't have a bunch of addresses (i.e. grandparents and anyone else)

love love love!

--Grant

Elder Stoddard"

An Overwhelming Start

Arriving in Ukraine was the scariest thing I had ever done in my life up to that point.  I think that these first e-mails really do a good job catching the stress I was feeling, though I did hide a lot so that people wouldn't worry about me.

From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>

Date: December 21, 2005 12:51:32 AM AKST

Subject: First e-mail overseas

"Hi,

Wow...things are CRAZY.  My head has not stopped spinning since I arrived here!  I have no clue what to think, it's just completely out of control.  So things are good though, my new companion's name is Elder Hassell and he's pretty cool.  The most amazing thing is he loves Caroline's Spine just as much as i do...go figure, I travel 5000 miles around the world to find someone who has heard of them.  cool eh?  Missionary work is a lot different than what I thought to be quite honest with you...I assumed tracting tracting tracting, but that couldn't be further from the truth...it's really a lot of planning lessons and meetings with people, and working in some tracting and what not.  So it's been an adaptation on so many levels.  Our appartment is kinda weird...small lots of crazy imperfections and the land lady has more stuff there than we do.  So it's all good :)  

I'm still getting used to it all, but things have gradually improved each day...it's been a pretty tough week.  the whole thought that I'm 5000 miles away from everyone is tough, I've been pretty homesick, but right as I find a reason to break down and cry, I start reading scriptures or something and pray, and things just pick up from there...

one thing is for sure, I'm definately figuring out that I'm very priviledged to have the family that I do.  I thought about it today...I can buy tons of stuff here for dirt cheap, so christmas is probably gonna be pretty good, but I'd trade it all to be home w/ you.  That's probably not the most uplifting comment, but it's what is on my mind right now.  I've entered the mission field at a very difficult time concerning loneliness and homesickness, but oh well все гаразд wow that's hard to type.

So yeah...I love you all tons, I'm stoked to be able to write emails.

Along the lines of Christmas calls...hooray!

[Here I wrote a lot about what time family should call and how to get a hold of me.]

Well, that's all the big important news  I needed to get out of the way.  Simple eh?  I hope.  Merry Christmas and Happy freakin' new year ;)

Trying to get adjusted and used to life has been a little stressful if you can't tell...at least I feel comfortable now to buy things...well for the most part

I'm getting to where I can pick out tidbits of what people are talking about, can't understand like anything and it's tough cuz I start to fall asleep in discussions...trying to catch back up and all, and when I try to make contacts by myself i get times when I have no clue what's going on...so I just say...the church is true and the book of mormon also...:)  It makes my task of being a bold missionary pretty easy ;)  cuz that's all I can say.

everything will work out...I know it, I have faith.  It's just a life adjustment.  The lord is taking care of me every step of the way, so I don't know why i worry at all.

well this is the big general one, I'll try to get pictures worked out, and maybe some simple hi's to everyone if time permits...we'll see.

Love you all so much!

--Grant

Elder Stoddard"

This is an e-mail that I sent to my mom.

From: "Wesley Stoddard" <gstoddard86@myldsmail.net>

Date: December 21, 2005 1:41:35 AM AKST

Subject: quick hi

"hey...I have a bit more time.

just wanna give a shout out to everyone...please know my general message was just chaotic...it feels good to get it over to be honest with ya.  I just hope all will work out w/ the christmas calls and all...I know it will, the Lord's helping :)

Hi meg, hi Mike, Hi Woman.

Tell Heidi Hi for me...I'm definately gonna work on getting pics to you...I've got em taken, now just gotta get them there.

tell Brayden Hi...Tell everyone Hi.  I love you all very much I hope you know that.

Woman, Reevna - that's how you pronounce Рівне (Rivne) just FYI

Yes I was very overwhelmed...and I quite frankly felt very small, insignificant and alone.  My home is long gone...but only for 2 years...and everyone does a good job of trying to help me out with worries and fears.

Merry Christmas...it feels normal here nothin really new and exciting...hmmm, just realized something...I read about Christ's birth today in the book of mormon...go figure 

I'm very grateful for his work.  which is now my work, and will be forever as a member of his church.  it's a bit scary to walk up to people and start talking, cuz I don't want them to talk back...I can say all I need to, but if they talk back...I'm SOL

anyway.  say hi to heidi for me...give her a big hug.

give each other big hugs.

KKLLHH [Kiss kiss, love love, hug hug.]

--Grant

Elder Stoddard""